My fellow Chicagoans I have a solution for you.
Select a current or former beloved Chicago athlete as Daley's future foe instead of an unknown politician.
As a matter of fact, we have ten ideal candidates that you might want to consider:
10. BRIAN URLACHER
Come on, look at that smirk.
Brian Urlacher was made to be a politician and would definitely have no problem playing the part.
9. NORM VAN LIER
Watch that video and tell me Norm Van Lier wouldn't catch your attention during a press conference. Van Lier possesses a quality so rare in the political realm that Chicagoans might not know what to do with it. That quality?
Brutal, and relentless honesty.
8. RYNE SANDBERG
The Chicago Cubs beloved second baseman would be a nice fit patrolling City Hall. Unfortunately, Joe Morgan may also announce his candidacy in an effort to block Sandberg from taking office.
7. JIM MCMAHON
Jimmy 'Mac' would get both Cubs and Sox fans votes and is old enough so that the seniors would actually remember who he is. Anyone on that '85 Bears team is solid gold potential.
6. ERNIE BANKS
As much as I'd like to make a joke at Ernie's expense I just can't bring myself to do it. Unfortunately I foresee a potential voting scandal after Ernie pleads with the public to vote twice.
Yikes, is this where jokes go to die?
5. BOBBY HULL
Despite being away from Chicago for so long, Bobby Hull is a name synonymous with the toughness and greatness associated with the Chicago Blackhawks franchise.
4. OZZIE GUILLEN
Ozzie's tenure as mayor may last for only about three weeks, but he'd definitely pick up his fair share of votes. The man who brought this city its first World Series championship in 88 years has some serious street cred and the vernacular to play Chicago hardball politics.
3. RON SANTO
The way I see it, Santo would be the Sen. John McCain of Chicago politics. The Hall of Fame has been holding his entrance hostage for years now and he's got the wounds to prove it.
2. MIKE 'DA COACH' DITKA
Would you vote against this man?
I didn't think so.
The Coach has reached that rarefied status of an 'untouchable' in this city and Daley would be best be served by taking a bottle of Mike's Kick Ass Red Wine and head on home.
1. MICHAEL JORDAN
Hands down, Michael Jordan would win this thing in a landslide. I can't even imagine the look on Daley's face when he hears that Michael Jordan is going to be running against him.
It must have been the same look that Karl Malone, John Stockton, Patrick Ewing, Reggie Miller, and Charles Barkley had when they found out Jordan was making his first comeback.
Come on, look at that smirk.Brian Urlacher was made to be a politician and would definitely have no problem playing the part.
9. NORM VAN LIER
Watch that video and tell me Norm Van Lier wouldn't catch your attention during a press conference. Van Lier possesses a quality so rare in the political realm that Chicagoans might not know what to do with it. That quality?
Brutal, and relentless honesty.
8. RYNE SANDBERG
The Chicago Cubs beloved second baseman would be a nice fit patrolling City Hall. Unfortunately, Joe Morgan may also announce his candidacy in an effort to block Sandberg from taking office.7. JIM MCMAHON
Jimmy 'Mac' would get both Cubs and Sox fans votes and is old enough so that the seniors would actually remember who he is. Anyone on that '85 Bears team is solid gold potential.6. ERNIE BANKS
As much as I'd like to make a joke at Ernie's expense I just can't bring myself to do it. Unfortunately I foresee a potential voting scandal after Ernie pleads with the public to vote twice.Yikes, is this where jokes go to die?
5. BOBBY HULL
Despite being away from Chicago for so long, Bobby Hull is a name synonymous with the toughness and greatness associated with the Chicago Blackhawks franchise.4. OZZIE GUILLEN
Ozzie's tenure as mayor may last for only about three weeks, but he'd definitely pick up his fair share of votes. The man who brought this city its first World Series championship in 88 years has some serious street cred and the vernacular to play Chicago hardball politics.3. RON SANTO
The way I see it, Santo would be the Sen. John McCain of Chicago politics. The Hall of Fame has been holding his entrance hostage for years now and he's got the wounds to prove it.2. MIKE 'DA COACH' DITKA
Would you vote against this man?I didn't think so.
The Coach has reached that rarefied status of an 'untouchable' in this city and Daley would be best be served by taking a bottle of Mike's Kick Ass Red Wine and head on home.
1. MICHAEL JORDAN
Hands down, Michael Jordan would win this thing in a landslide. I can't even imagine the look on Daley's face when he hears that Michael Jordan is going to be running against him.It must have been the same look that Karl Malone, John Stockton, Patrick Ewing, Reggie Miller, and Charles Barkley had when they found out Jordan was making his first comeback.
3 comments:
Ron Santo doesn't have a leg to stand on.
I'm not sure if Ozzie has US citizenship... seriously it wouldn't cross my mind.
Good list there O man! No doubt MJ would win if he ran against RD. He is the best Chicago has ever had and ever will.
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