Here at TTCS, we recognize the many great rivalries in Chicago sports. With those rivalries have come some players who we can’t stand. Some of those players we hate because not only they kill us; and they’re assholes. There are others we hate, but have to respect.



10. Sterling Sharpe – The five time Pro-Bowler just wrecked the Bears and the entire NFL before suffering a career-ending neck injury in 1994. Once his career ended, you had to feel for the guy because he really loved to play football. He turned into a decent analyst (and I say decent because he isn’t yelling ridiculous remarks like his brother over at CBS) but he wasn’t able to capture a title before going out.



9. Patrick Ewing – Personally Patrick Ewing annoys the hell out of me. He killed the Bulls, but never really defeated us. When he finally DID get his revenge on the Bulls in 94, Hakeem Olajuwon and the Rockets beat them in the Finals anyways. A career loser, and habitual whiner, Ewing only gets respect in my book for going down in history for receiving oral sex from strippers in the infamous Gold Club trial in Atlanta. That must have been the sweatiest blowjob in history.



8. Barry Sanders – Like Ewing, Barry never won anything, and he is probably the most overrated running back ever, but he killed the Bears. Barry was respectable however for his quiet demeanor, and his willingness to stick it to Wayne Fontes, and the Lions ownership for not giving him any talent on the defensive side of the ball. Barry also looks a lot like Cyrus from the Warriors. CAN YOU DIG IT!



7. Cris Carter / Randy Moss – The Viking duo absolutely torched the Bears, but they were so good at doing it, it was hard not to enjoy the show. The years in which Randall Cunningham was at the helm in Moss’ first couple years were especially dominant. Besides, Moss mooned Packer fans, and pissed off Joe Buck.



6. John Stockton – Stockton was a warrior during his playing days, but when I did some research on him and his current life, I stumbled upon him having six kids and living next door to his parents. For some reason I want a reality show about this. Does he still wear those short shorts when he cuts his grass?



5. Joe Dumars – Those “Bad Boys” Pistons teams will probably go down in Chicago history as being the assholes who tried to kill Jordan. They also stood us up on handshakes from time-to-time, but Joey D was a stone cold killer. Jordan has reportedly called him the best defender he ever played against (a VERY high compliment), and Dumars also has the NBA’s sportsmanship award named after him.



4. Steve Yzerman – Stevie Y was always among the greats, and he killed the Hawks but he wasn’t a complete player until Scotty Bowman took the Red Wings helm in 93. After that, he forced Yzerman to focus on both offense and defense and Yzerman truly became on of the game’s best players. I also respect him for not being a dirty communist like Sergei Federov.




3. Albert Pujols – One of my favorite moments at a sporting event came in a Cubs-Cardinals game a couple years back. It was a Sunday night game, and Pujols came to bat with a rawkus “Pujols Sucks!” chant going in the background during the at-bat. Albert worked the count a bit, found his pitch, and smoked the ball onto Waveland Avenue. I’ll always remember that look Pujols gave as he was rounding the bases; it was just like any other home run to him, and he was above the crowd. Unbelievable moment.



2. Johan Santana – The only reason Johan makes it above champions like Pujols, and Yzerman is because his unbelievable knack for killing the White Sox. I mean the guy was just unbeatable on the Twins. When he was moved to the Mets this summer every Sox fan collectively gave a sigh of relief. My friend Chris summed it up best when he texted me right after the trade saying, “well now we can win 5 more games this year.”



1. Brett Favre – Brett Favre ruined my childhood. That pretty much sums up my feeling for him as a professional football player. That being said, as a football fan, with his propensity to make big plays (good or bad) it was always exciting to watch Brett Favre play. You could tell Favre was miserable in the Bears game at Solider Field this year, and how cold he was in that game against the Giants in the playoffs. It doesn’t surprise me he is gone, but it will probably be weird (and sweet for the Bears) when Aaron Rodgers is under center. P.S. (Brett, you still suck)


Honorable Mention:

Sean May
Nikolas Lindstrom
Brett Hull
Mark Price
(Insert Milwaukee Bucks Player here; they’ve had nobody good since the Big O)