Monday, March 23, 2009

Top Ten Chicago Sports Sissies

EDITOR'S NOTE: I, Phil Barnes, am out of town for the week and was unable to write a post for this Monday. (Guilt is throughout me.) So instead of just leaving everybody hanging until Danny's interesting list on Tuesday (I just got the email, it's a good one so stay tuned), I decided to dig into the plethora of older posts and re-air one that we all got a kick out of. Enjoy!  Ironically, none of these guys possess a job in the city anymore. There is probably a reason too.

Dedicated to the guys that are always hurt…

10. LF Scott Podsednik, White Sox

While most athletes strive to be known for their toughness, Pods seems perfectly satisfied that his legacy is having a hot wife.

9. RB Cedric Benson, Bears

Um, he’s rushed for more career yards than Curtis Enis. So he’s got that going for him.

8. F Eric Daze, Blackhawks

Daze may not be durable, but at least he’s intelligent...

7. QB Rex Grossman, Bears

The last two years, injuries haven’t been Grossman’s problem. It’s been that whole ‘throwing the ball to the other team’ thing.

6. 3B Joe Crede, White Sox

No word yet if back injuries make you swing repeatedly at high fastballs out of the strike zone.

5. G Jay Williams, Bulls

“I mean, he's really 'always' injured” –Matt Olsen

4. S Mike Brown, Bears

Unlike everyone else on this list, it hurts making fun of Brown. It’s a shame he’s always injured; the Bears are so much better with him on the field.

3. P Mark Prior, Cubs

Apparently having ‘perfect mechanics’ means your right shoulder is made of glass.

2. F Martin Havlat, Blackhawks

Even Patrick Kane thinks Havlat is a wuss.

1. P Kerry Wood, Cubs

In our next list, Top Ten pitchers who have had their careers ruined by Dusty Baker, Wood may take the top spot again. Don't worry Cubs fans, it could be worse. At least your closer isn't Eric Gagne.


Anonymous said...

havlat still has a job

Nick said...

Mark Prior may be a sissy but his quilt is hiding a permanent injury for contract purposes, $$, deceiving the owners. Who knows what happens after no longer taking steriods?

Anonymous said...

Luol Deng?